I know I come on here a lot to say “well here’s why I didn’t post this week”, but I figure an update is better than just disappearing. I’ve been trying to “get over” my health issues and stop having all these emotions about them. I keep telling myself that I’ve been sick long enough and it’s time to just be used to it and not be upset anymore. But all that suppressing blew up in my face last week and I got really suicidal. I got help and was stabilized. I’m trying to let myself experience my feelings more and grieve, hurt, get angry, etc, without wallowing. Letting myself get in touch with these feelings means I don’t have as much inspiration for humor right now, but I plan on posting more when it comes back to me.
Anonymous said: There's this really awesome boy I know and really like. At first, I kept strong walls around me in order for him to not see how I really was. Then I just grew careless and started being myself around him, and it scared him off. I miss him so much and I desperately want to move on, but it's so difficult. I don't know what to do anymore.
Is he still in your life at all? Maybe it wasn’t your true self that scared him off, but rather the change in you that without explanation might have been confusing. Sometimes just sitting down and explaining things to someone and letting them know it’s okay to ask questions really fixes things. But if he isn’t in your life, remember that there are so many people in this world and yes, there will be people who can’t or won’t handle you, but there will also be loads who think you’re the shit and will embrace everything about you.
It’s ok to let yourself miss him. It’s ok to feel that loss. Don’t try to rush yourself through it and make it all better before you’re ready. It’s ok to hurt. And remember that him running doesn’t mean you should change yourself. It doesn’t mean you should hide who you are to make other people comfortable. You’re worth more than that. Be yourself and then the people who love you will be loving you for who you really are. And you will meet those people.
From Post Secret
I don’t know why, but today I got so many more lovely anons than usual. I’ve been feeling that kind of loneliness that’s so intense that it feels like someone tore a hole in my chest. I haven’t been very faithful about posting or about answering questions, so it means a lot that you guys are still so supportive and awesome and lovely.